So that cheeky TOWIE lot are back on our screens on a new channel, ITVbe. I’m sure we all can’t wait to see what shenanigans they get up to in Ibiza, but to celebrate first, here’s a look at my top ten favourite TOWIE moments.
1. Diags wanting to take Chloe to a ‘Cat Farm’
As much as we all love the Diags/Fran and Elliot/Chloe pairing, there was still a bit of us that always hoped Chloe and Diags would end up together. From giving him motherly advice about Sudocream to his love life, it’s clear Chloe has always had a soft spot for her little cousins bestie. So when she was in need of a bit of cheering up, Diags decided he wanted to take her to a ‘Cat farm’ only to be let down gently and told no such thing exists. If it did, I assure you Diags, I would live there.
2. Lydia’s return
We all LOVED Lydia, so it was a shocker when she left to get away from Arg, who repeatedly professed his love for her while sleeping with everything that moves. They say revenge is a dish best served cold, so we can only imagine how great Lydia felt rocking up at the finale of series 11 looking like this, making Arg scuttle away like the little cockroach he is because he looked like an absolute state. Karma?
3. Danielle falling in the bush
I think I’m right to say, we’ve all been missing a little bit of comic relief in TOWIE since Joey left. So with laughs pretty uncommon in more recent series, it was great to see Danielle take a tumble after giving Lockie an incredibly serious list of agreements if he wanted her back. Lockie then retaliated by giving her one back, but maybe he should of added a ‘don’t make a tit of yourself’ clause?
4. Lucy throwing a drink at Mario
I’ve mentioned it on this blog before, and I’ll probably mention it again. More than once. Because seeing Mr Mario Falcone, AKA, smugness personified get a big glass of red wine thrown in his chops for being such a douche bag while wearing all white is one of my favourite moments on any TV show to ever exist.
Thank god you don’t drink white wine Lucy!
5. Arg turns up at Gemma’s naked with a fish
Another moment from James Argent, which serves to remind us all that sometimes we just really wish we could unsee things. Turning up to apologise to Gemma with some fish, James had to promptly hide round the corner as Gemma’s Mum Joan came to the door. If Joan is anything like us, she will feel her eyes have been violated permanently by this sight, which is akin to when you see something horrifying but just can’t drag your eyes away.
6. Mark Wright leaving
Hearts broke all over the world when Mark Wright announced he was leaving TOWIE as he needed to get out of Essex for a while. Having your bar burned down is probably a pretty big hint you are not going down too well on TV. Although it doesn’t seem like he is planning a permanent return anytime soon, our hearts (and be honest ladies, minges) do a little flutter whenever he crops up at a Wright family do.
7. Joey drives the boys into the middle of a lake
Who can forget when Joey rocked up to meet the boys in a boat car, and drove them all into a lake, in none other than Basildon.
8. Kirk takes Amy to the zoo
(image from: http://i.ytimg.com/vi/hr71yvRsDts/maxresdefault.jpg)
Yes this was so long ago in TOWIE time that the only image available is a blurry shit one, and although it may seem like years ago, it really wasn’t so long ago that Kirk tried to woo Amy by taking her on a walk round the tiger enclosure. Unfortunately loves young dream didn’t last too long, and Kirk was promptly taking explicit videos of himself and sleeping with Jodie Marsh.
9. Joey walking on water
Oh Joey, him and his little adventures leave you in no wonder why he features so much in the list. After excitedly buying a pair of trainers that allowed him to ‘walk on water’ he bravely run into the middle of the lake and got two full steps before his magic shoes gave up on him.
10. Gemma thinks Mick is bringing her champagne
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Saving the best until last, my all time top TOWIE moment. Gemma thought Mick was bringing her champagne after she went full on bunny boiler and randomly left a pie on his doorstep. Receiving a massive pie to the face herself, she was left crying her eyes out when he walked straight past her and gave it to someone else. Classic!